Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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