We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
