PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
