Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
