You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
