This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize