She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize