Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
This toilet bowl is my home.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
