i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
