forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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