If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
