just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
