We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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