Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
