two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize