This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
