I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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