do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
