I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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