I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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