Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize