youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
where are you?
Hypothermia
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
My vagina is very pro this idea
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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