Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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