Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
being pregnant is like rehab
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize