hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
