hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
