hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
