Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
