shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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