pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
