So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
