coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize