So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
