I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
