i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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