i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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