Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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