Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
