You're my little dorito
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
