the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
