I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
