Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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