I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
