great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
