this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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