I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
