FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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