sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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