were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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