did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Found the puke drawer
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
