is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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