I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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